1) Look Dirty. When you or your staff tend bar look dirty; wear well worn clothing, the same clothes you wore the day before work great. If possible make sure the clothing has stains or has grease spots. If you don’t’ have soiled clothing anything with rips or tears will work just as well to help you lose profits.
2) Bitch, Bitch, Bitch. Whenever possible bitch in front of customers. Any subject is good but the best topics tend to be: spouses, taxes, local law enforcement and any state or federal politician. Listening to bitching encourages customers to reduce their time in your bar and drive your sales down.
3) Over Serve Customers. Watching an individual sway back and forth in a bar stool and mumble incoherently is so amusing and it’s intriguing to watch an over served customer head for the restroom or walk out the door; no one knows if they are going to stumble or fall. Knowing that you “over serve” reassures everyone they can count on you to over serve them and once again your profits will decrease.
4) Tolerate Obnoxious Customers. (My personal favorite). By all means tolerate obnoxious customers. Allow small groups (men or women – it doesn’t make a difference) to drop the F bomb and shout “F” once in a while. It’s charming to hear a discussion about this F-ng thing and that F-ng thing and all the F-ng things wrong in the F-ng world and all the things F-ng up someone’s life. Yeap, permitting rude and repugnant behaviors will really help you lose profits.
5) Loud Juke Boxes and TVs. Blaring juke boxes and deafening TV volumes are a must. There’s nothing better than to sip on a drink and watch the few people who wanted the volume cranked up wiggle on the bar floor; it’s almost as much fun as listening to a couple of loud mouths yell at a TV screen. Cranking up the volume really does have an impact on your sales.
6) Garbage and Trash. Try to have garbage and trash visible in your bar. It doesn’t have to be a lot but it must be noticeable. Examples are empty beer bottles on games tops, rubbish in the window sills and trash building-up under the pool table. A real plus is to never wipe down the bar counter or table tops after a customer leaves. New arrivals love the surprise of laying their arms or hands on a sticky surface. Two other proven profit losing techniques to consider are never: 1) clean under the bar’s foot rail or 2) pick up litter outside. Customer appreciate the dust balls accumulating under the bar rail and seeing empty beer cans and trash blowing around your parking lot and front entrance. Garbage is such an easy way to lose revenues.
7) Repulsive Restrooms. A true favorite. Only scrub out the sinks, wipe down the mirrors and clean the lavatories in your restrooms once a month. Also only re-paint the walls and stalls once every two or three years. To accelerate the loss of profits have broken paper towel dispensers and out-of-order hand dryers in the restrooms. There really is nothing better that walking into a disgusting, graffiti marked restroom then not being able to dry your hands. Yeah, losing bar profits can be so easy.
Well there you have it, Eba G’s Seven (7) Guaranteed Ways To Lose Money With Your Bar or Tavern. Some of you may have already tried a few of these ideas and know they work well. Feel free to try the rest. If you liked them send me an email firstname.lastname@example.org or tweet me @EbaG2. If I get enough feedback I’ll share The 7 Wonderful Ways to Lose Regular and Longtime Customers. Rest assured these ideas will be easy to implement as well and extremely effective.
Remember when you want to increase your Bar’s, Tavern’s, Pub’s or Post’s profits Eba G. is here and always ready to help.